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Question from Bamboozled Hand  on 8/19/2005 | comment

Dear Laura,
     I have two Norns that used to be best friends, but they got into a fight over one of them using the other's toothbrush. I didn't even know that Norns had teeth! I feel like I can't really help them patch it up, because I'm an outsider to Norn society. Can you please give me a hint on how to help these two friends reconcile?
- Bamboozled Hand


Dear Bamboozled Hand,
     Give the other Norn a toothbrush of his own? A novelty one that lights up and plays a merry tune whilst he brushes his teeth. On second thought, you'd better give them both a novelty toothbrush, we don't want any jealousy. Hopefully, that should divert them from any further arguments. Norns can be so fickle sometimes, yet easily bribed too...
- Laura
 
Question from Ashling  on 8/17/2005 | comment

Dear Laura,
     I live in Albia, and recently the Hand has been very good to us in the way of COBs. Life has been lazy and slow, a change from running scared of the Grendel! One day, I was going about my business, and I noticed a strange egg in the sky. For some reason, I can't get it out of my head and all I want to do is join with it. The Hand doesn't understand me any more; it wants me to do petty things like "push food". How can I explain to it that all I want is up there in that egg?
- Ashling


Dear Ashling,
     Why don't you start an alternative Norn cult, say, 'Eggism'? You and your fellow 'Eggists' could be shamelessly brainwashed into thinking that the 'Great Egg One', (or in Bibble, "Gah-Geg-No") is even more higher and mightier than The Lone Shee himself! Your daily routine would include: pledging allegiance to 'Gah Geg No' morning, noon and before and after meals, momentous sacrifices of cheese and singing bleak, dreary songs of worship around the lighthouse. Your life would be one of servitude and oppression and your Hand would be powerless to intervene, for remember, 'Gah Geg No's' authority overrules all! ;)
- Laura
 
Question from Kelseykatking  on 8/16/2005 | comment

Dear Laura,
     I've gone insane! I downloaded the Terra metaroom and made a farm there with every critter possible! I even downloaded Tails, from 'Albian Oceans', and they play with the Jigglypuffs to keep them happy, swim with the Zoras, push the Easter Bunnies, so the Norns in the Meso have eggs, and even fly with the flying critters! Is there a cure for such insaneness?
- Kelseykatking


Dear Kelseykatking,
     You can never have too many critters I say. ;) But they do sound like a lot of disorderly louts. Why not use them to your advantage? Enrole them in miltary school and train them to be your very own troop of well disciplined helpful boy scouts! ... Or critters, in your case.
- Laura
 
Question from Oddball  on 8/15/2005 | comment

Dear Laura,
     Help! I hit my head and now I think I've gone crazy! The sky is green and the grass is blue. Is there any cure or am I just gonna be an outcast Norn? :(
- Oddball


Dear Oddball,
     Yes, that's what happens when you keep bumping into walls... Silly Norn. I imagine it should all subside within a few days.
- Laura
 
Question from Bamboozled Hand  on 8/15/2005 | comment

Dear Laura,
     I have a tribe of nine very mischievous Norns that are always up to something. One of them in particular is very hyperactive - when I'm putting the others to bed, or getting them to sit down and play quietly, she always gets into the balls and the skipping ropes. I don't want to break her spirit, or have to hide the toys, but I do want her to listen when I say things of importance, such as "No push weed". Is a firm voice and a little guidance all that's needed with her?
- Bamboozled Hand


Dear Bamboozled Hand,
     Perhaps it's time you took her aside for a little talk. Explain to her that even though you want her to enjoy herself, there are times where she needs to be a good Norn and do as she's told. Tell her that it's your job to educate her about the dangers in Albia, so instead of playing with the skipping ropes and the balls during those lessons, it's vital that she gives you her undivided attention. She may protest at first, but it's important that you stand your ground, in a firm but fair manner, so she knows what acceptable behaviour is and what's not. She'll soon learn to accept what you're asking of her in time. Don't forget to reward her with a tickle when she does as she's told, that way she'll link the reward to the action, and it'll also boost her morale. :)
- Laura
 
Question from Another Mad Scientist  on 8/13/2005 | comment

Dear Laura,
     Can Norns develop a "Pavlovan Response"? For example, if a bell is rung while they're being fed Pavlova, will they associate the sound of the bell with Pavlova, and anticipate Pavlova when the bell is rung?
- Another Mad Scientist


Dear Another Mad Scientist,
     Erm... Sure why not?! Perhaps you could teach them to walk the tight-rope whilst you're at it. However, remember that Norns aren't the most intelligent or easiest creatures to train, so it's likely you'll need a couple of Aspirin before you're done. ;)
- Laura
 
Question from Ailsah of Berlin  on 8/12/2005 | comment

Dear Laura,
     The Hand has set up a Wolfling Run in my world, with some Norns in the Jungle Terrarium, and some Norns in the Meso. My problem is that the Norn that I love is in the Meso, and I've been put in the jungle, and we're separated by stopper-plants, creature switches, and anything and everything that the Hand can design! I'm worried that I'll never see him again... :( Can you help me?
- Ailsah of Berlin


Dear Ailsah of Berlin,
     Your Hand should be ashamed of itself, leaving a helpless Norn alone in a treacherous jungle like that. Is it trying to give you a nervous breakdown? Now, I happen to know that there's a teleporter located at the top of the Terrarium that'll transport you to the Norn Meso. It can easily be reached, you just need a good strategy. Ever heard of the art of Escapology? It the practice of escaping from restraints or other traps. Use this method, assisted by a rope, to safely manoeuvre around all of the Hand's devices. Perhaps secure the rope to a tree and swing across Tarzan-style to the teleporter. All this should be done under cover of darkness though, to avoid being caught red-handed. I would also advise that you don't stay in the Meso for too long, as the Hand might realise you're missing. Good luck!
- Laura
 
Question from Nishette  on 8/9/2005 | comment

Dear Laura,
     I have a very pretty Bruin Norn that I think she would look beautiful in a plaid skirt. Are there any clothes for Creatures 3 Norns? Or for that matter, any Norn clothes?
- Nishette


Dear Nishette,
     To my knowledge, all Norns are philosophically opposed to wearing clothes, (with the exception of the Creatures Village Norns). ;)
- Laura
 
Question from Hungry Norn  on 8/7/2005 | comment

Dear Laura,
     The dispensers don't dispense what you want, even though there's that little dispenser that gives what you ask for but a very little portion of it. The Hand when he's doing something else gets tired of pressing the buttons over and over again just to satisfy our hunger. So I was wondering if there is a dispenser that could satisfy our needs without us or the Hand needing to do anything.
- Hungry Norn


Dear Hungry Norn,
     I think that you're just being plain lazy. The Hand has better, more important things to attend to than push vendors all day. You guys are perfectly capable, activate them yourselves. ;)
- Laura
 
Question from Thumbellina the Norn  on 8/6/2005 | comment

Dear Laura,
     I was born with a very wonky gait, of which all the other Norns tease me about. :( I never get to do any of the fun stuff, because I'm too tired out just trying to find something to eat! I'm doing my best to hide this from the Hand, as I've heard rumours of a thing called the 'Recycle Bin' which really scares me. But I can't stay still forever while it's in the world! Can you help me?
- Thumbellina the Norn


Dear Thumbellina the Norn,
     If you like classic cars, get this nice Volkswagen Beetle COB to zip around Albia in. Not only will this enable you to disguise your mobility problems, but you'll also astound everyone with your modern transportation savvy and it'll do absolute wonders for your street cred! :D
- Laura
 

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