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 Tea Queen Laura    |
1. Do not post your real names 2. Do not post any phone numbers  Okay so you post your response to the person above you's answering machine message. Then you post your own fictional answering machine message: "Good morning, thank you for calling. Don't bother leaving a message, I never call back anyway. Have a great day." |
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 KC11 |
"Hello, sir or madam. My name is Duke Pomlington of the Sort of Seen University. I am here to inform you that your house will be demolished in order to make way for the world's first above ground subway. You might want to move in five, four, three...." "Good evening, thank you for calling me. I don't get too many people calling me. Why not leave a nice, long message? Maybe leave your phone number? Address? Possibly your relationship status? Please? I'm so lonely...." Do not upset the ugly worm, lest it be a dragon in disguise. (>oo)> |
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 Dreamnorn |
"Hi, there! I'm a three-foot-tall psychotic cannibal that thinks your voice sounds absolutely delicious! How about you call me back some time? Tell you what, I have you chipped so don't bother calling back; maybe we can schedule a dinner date soon?" "I WAS FRAMED! Leave a message, whoever you are, but I swear, I'm INNOCENT! *loud click*"  |
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 Norn7b6 |
"Hello Nut Farm Chif Macadanim speeking, how may we searv you?" "Afus lundry" "Hello this is the morg, D. Ceased speeking, How may we beary you?" |
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Dreamnorn |
"Yes, this is inspector Zohm B. of Area 52 here. It appears that the deceased you have buried in this cemetery have turned undead because of toxic soil. You must already know this, since we can hear this loud groaning in the background and--" "I'm sorry, the number you've reached has been temporarily disabled. Maybe it's because the person who originally used it is now zombie chow. Please leave a message after the tone. (beep)" |
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Norn7b6 |
"Greetings I Yel-al have set up this "answering maschean" so I can get some peace and quiet from you stuped Tellie maketers and those stuped earth kids who pray practicle jokes, now as your lisaning to this i am getting infomation as we speek on who you are and where you live, so this better be worth it, thankyou please dont call back or else" |
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 Melody |
"ring" "ring" "ring!" Please leave a message after the beep. "Beep!" Person who is calling: Hello, this is Crappy Cars Industry where we can give you the worst car that you've ever seen! We currently have these types of cars in stock. rusty cars worn out cars broken cars cars with no tires and a lot of other cars. Answering machine: Hello, this is Cruddy dude, I'm not home right now because I'm going out to get me a Crappy Car!  |
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 Epaeris |
Well, I just wanted to inform you that all cars in a 200 mile radius have been distingrated. Sorry. Thank you for calling Bondai, Inc. How may I help. Please press 9 to talk to a Bonsai tree. |
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Dreamnorn |
"*presses nine* Joe? Joey? Is that you? I can't believe it! I never thought I'd reach you. You just stay there and wait, Joey. I'm hiring a police force to rescue you from those evil Treehuggers before--" *clicks off because he forgot to insert a quarter* "Thank you for calling Lemmings Ltd.! Here we serve all caring customers and employees by teaching them how to give themselves a death-wish. Nobody can come to the phone right now, which means we're probably OUT TO LUNCH, if you know what I mean... anyway, please leave a message at the sound of the tone! *BEEP*" |
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 EmergencyTowel |
"yes.this is the cheif of police,we have a warrant to search you,but we are just going to raid you lunch and steal food,than use my police cheif power to get away with it. goodbye!" ".........PANCAKES! HAHAHAHAHHAH!" In my nerd cave, nobody can hear you scream. Feed my pets: Shroomy and Glow! |
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KC11 |
Hello sir. This is the International House of Pancakes. We must inform you that you are hereby banned for life from our "prestigious" establishment, and should you come within a ten mile radius of our restaurant, we will come out and shoot you. Hey kids! Welcome to my answering machine! Can you say phone number? Very good! Can you leave a message? YAY! This is called an analog device! Can you say giant and old? YAY! Do not upset the ugly worm, lest it be a dragon in disguise. (>oo)> |
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EmergencyTowel |
"yes,i can. I am going to eat you for banning me from IHOP!" "This is an angry,pancake loving cannibal's anwsering machine here,and I am going to eat the guy that baned me from IHOP" In my nerd cave, nobody can hear you scream. Feed my pets: Shroomy and Glow! |
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 rainbowcat1 |
"Um, yes, this is your girlfriend, Horace. Please don't eat me, but I'm calling it quits. I didn't sign on for a pancake fanatic! But if you, you know, decide that waffles are better, we can talk about getting back together. So, yeah, don't call me until then. Um, bye." "You have reached Treehugger Hippie Commune. To join the commune, press 4. To speak to a representative of the Commune, press 12.... .... .... .... ....If you have realized by now that we are Hippies and don't check our phones often, because we don't like technology, press *26. To leave a message, press #94." "Everything you can imagine is real" ~Pablo Picasso  |
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