Dear Laura,
     I have always adored your column. Your mild humor, good advice, and, yes, even your sarcasm! But last month you were gone, no trace of the beautiful comedic advice I so craved. For leaving me in a great time of need, I feel so abandoned! Now I no longer have the fur on my tail! (Don't ask! It involves a Grendel, a cheese machine, and some garden tools) How are you going to atone for this ghastly sin?
- A Very Angry Fan