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| Question from Simon the Grendel on 12/5/2009 Dear Laura, Dear Simon the Grendel, I'll let into a secret... When a boy Grendel likes a girl Grendel very much, he starts to want to do strange things, like shine his scales, and take long walks with her. When you do these activities, although you might think it's yuck now, you will enjoy them very much. So, why not ask the Hand to help you choose a mail-order bride from The Creature Repository, and then set up an introduction? I recommend that your first date takes place during the day, in a romantic setting like the Grendel tree house, or the piranha pond, somewhere you can get to know each other over a nice picnic lunch. After that it?s entirely up to you. I also suggest that you carry a nice colourful bunch of fungi upon meeting, as a gift for your new girlfriend. You may feel like it's a waste of time to meet girls, but when a boy Grendel and a girl Grendel kisspop, the most wonderful thing can happen - a new egg! So, when you?re both ready, just remember to follow up the slap with a bit of tickle and your world's population crisis will be at an end.  - Laura |
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